Monday, February 1, 2016

canada dry tonic water

I am doing a flex schedule this week, and it meant taking the light rail to the comedy club tonight. didn't have the chance to get to super-America like I am used to, so I stopped at a convenience store near the club and got a sandwich. the drink I got was Canada dry tonic water, containing quinine. the sandwich was fine, but didn't like the drink because I didn't like the taste of it. so I guess there is another thing on my list of what I won't drink again, besides soy milk egg nog. I had to look up what quinine is, and the Wikipedia article said it is a medication to prevent and treat malaria. it is the flavor component in tonic water and bitter lemon. I took a few sips of it and couldn't handle it anymore, so I dumped out the rest of it. it was a 10-ounce bottle, cost me just a dollar. so thankfully I wasn't out that much money over it. it was in a glass bottle, I don't see these too often now. also notable from the comedy club tonight was seeing the nurse's aide for the first time in a while, we hugged. sounds like she will be making it to the clubs on a more regular basis now. so of course I am thrilled to hear this.
    the morning didn't start off well, as my date from just over a week ago came back from a weekend of travel and said 'no' to date 2. it sucks to hear it, but I do value the honesty. a Filipino man I work with showed me a message on a smart phone from a cousin if I am not mistaken that also got dumped. and the cousin's message looked a lot like what I received. I did have a date over the weekend, with a different match. but now I am starting to ask myself some tough questions about if I am still interested. I am still doing the flex schedule in spite of the canceled date as I can't change the schedule this late, I had this confirmed by my boss's boss. all of this may have motivated me to try harder with my STEP interview, which was mid-morning. it didn't thrill me to have it that time of day, but I couldn't get it moved to a better time. I feel that I presented myself well, and I know I relied on what works from performing.
   I am still left wondering 'where do we go from here?' with my social life. it was hard to get past the problem I had with my first attempt at a meetup event. I signed up and it got canceled. but it looks like there are two more events on Friday that interest me, now I have to decide which one to attend.
   it worked well on taking light rail home after I wasn't picked to perform, as I didn't have to wait long for the train. I picked up some trash on the train and threw it out at my stop.
  considering what happened, it comes as no surprise to say I looked up some songs on youtube that seemed appropriate. it was 'impossible' by shontelle, and 'heartbeat song' by Kelly Clarkson. with the former I always liked it due to the 'all my scars are open' line. but another one that works from the shontelle song 'I should take caution when it comes to love'. with the latter, it will long remind me of last year's visit to see some 'old haunts' in suburban Chicago. Kelly's song gives me hope when it comes to love, but I am finding out we do tend to create our own opportunities and internet dating doesn't seem to have all that many. the video for it is memorable. I have froze the screen so I can read things like the break-up letter. it says 'I just can't keep on like this. you and I will never work'. then there is the lipstick on the mirror later on, that says 'I will love again'. or the lady standing outside on an upper level, thinking and not looking happy, like she may jump. I still don't understand why I get so excited about nearly all of my dates but most of them don't feel the same way.

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